Best Beer Cheers and Drunk Toasts
Funny beer toasts and drunk cheers can really break the ice at a party. Many people though are not good at delivering these hilarious drunk speeches and need a bit of advice. I recommend that you be confident, speak loudly and clearly and have a drink in your hand ready to go. My friend Mike Comer delivered some great beer toasts this weekend at a housewarming party. Hearing him inspired me to make a list of some of the best beer cheers, bar toasts and drunken speeches I could find. Cheers to the toasts below!
Great Drinking Toasts: When you are drinking, you sometimes need a good toast. Below I have collected some of the best drinking toasts I could find.
“Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends!” Mike Comer
“Here’s to women’s kisses,
and to whiskey, amber clear;
not as sweet as a woman’s kiss,
but a damn sight more sincere.”
“To Woman — She needs no eulogy — she speaks for herself. ” Every Man
“Here’s to woman! Would that we could fall
into her arms without falling into her hands.” Ambrose Pierce
“Of all my favorite things to do,
The utmost is to have a brew.
My love grows for my foamy friend,
With each thirst-quenching elbow bend.
Beer’s so frothy, smooth and cold–
It’s paradise–pure liquid gold.
Yes, beer means many things to me…
That’s all for now, I gotta pee!”
“MEN, start your livers!”
“Here’s to the ideal woman; Who could ask for more? She’s deaf ‘n dumb, oversexed, and owns a liquor store.”
“Today we celebrate all the good things you have found in each other, a best friend, a lover, a teacher, a playmate and a true partner in life. Cheers!”
“Here’s to ___, May he live respected and die regretted”
“Here’s to Hell! May my stay there be as much fun as my way there!”
“He that buys land buys many stones.
He that buys flesh buys many bones.
He that buys eggs buys many shells,
But he that buys good beer buys nothing else.”
“Here’s to those who sit when they pee.
We love ‘em in leather,
We love ‘em in lace,
But we love ‘em the best when they sit on our face!”
Drunk guy: Here’s hoping you’re in Heaven ten minutes before the devil knows you’re dead.
Drunk girl: What’s that mean?
Drunk guy: It’s an Irish toast.
Drunk girl: Oh. Well, here’s to bread, eggs and cinnamon.
Drunk guy: Huh?
Drunk girl: That’s French toast.
” He that buys land buys many stones.
He that buys flesh buys many bones.
He that buys eggs buys many shells,
But he that buys good beer buys nothing else.”
Champagne costs too much,
Whiskey’s too rough,
Vodka puts big mouths in gear.
This little refrain
Should help to explain
Why it’s better to order a beer!
For every wound, a balm.
For every sorrow, cheer.
For every storm, a calm.
For every thirst, a beer
Here’s to the maiden of bashful fifteen;
Here’s to the widow of fifty;
Here’s to the flaunting, extravagant queen,
And here ’s to the housewife that’s thrifty!
Let the toast pass;
Drink to the lass;
I’ll warrant she’ll prove an excuse for the glass.
Gentlemen, start your livers!
I used to know a clever toast,
But now I cannot think it,
So fill your glass to anything,
And damn your souls, I’ll drink it!
May your coffin have six handles of finest silver! May your coffin be carried by six fair young maids!
And may your coffin be made of finest wood
from a 100-year-old tree
that I’ll go plant tomorrow!
When the hour is nigh me,
Let me in a tavern die,
With a tankard by me. “Gentlemen, I bid you, a toast to our wives
Who make our lives complete
Drink to those women who love us well
so beautiful and sweet
May God grant this wish
the twain shall never meet!”
“To Truthful Woman: Here’s to the love that lies in woman’s eyes….. And lies, and lies, and lies. ”
Here’s to the women who love me terribly,
May they soon improve.
“Of all my favorite things to do,
The utmost is to have a brew.
My love grows for my foamy friend,
With each thirst-quenching elbow bend.
Beer’s so frothy, smooth and cold–
It’s paradise–pure liquid gold.
Yes, beer means many things to me…
That’s all for now, I gotta pee!”
Here�s to a long life and a happy one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold beer and another one!
“Here’s to the King! What King? Fuh-King!
Awesome Beer Cheers: When you’re drinking beer you often want to cheers. The best beer cheers on the internet are collected below for your amusement and pleasure. Warning: Use carefully, many people do not approve of these toasts and cheers.
“Here’s to the guy who is never blue,
Here’s to the buddy who is ever true,
Here’s to the pal, no matter what the load,
Who never declines, just one for the road.”
“Here’s to honor-
Get on her,
Stay on her,
And if you can’t cum in her,
Cum on her.
Here’s to the hole that never heals,
The more you rub it the better it feels,
And all the soap this side of hell,
Won’t wash away that fishy smell”
“Life is a jest and all things show it I thought so once and now I know it.”
“Here’s to you and here’s to me, And here’s to all the girls that lick us where we pee!”
“Champagne costs too much,
Whiskey’s too rough,
Vodka puts big mouths in gear.
This little refrain
Should help to explain
Why it’s better to order a beer!”
Drunk Speeches: Occasionally you need to go on a drunken ramble. Here are some of the finest drunk speeches given by man and recommended for your usage and inspiration.
“I have known Jeremy for six years, ever since he and I started university together. During this time he has been a source of great companionship, many enjoyable nights out, and occasionally some very high scoring coursework.”
“To women and horses, And the men that ride them!”
“The girl of my dreams has dyed her hair,
And now it’s a fiery red.
She drinks, she smokes, and she tells dirty jokes;
She hasn’t a brain in her head
The girl of my dreams is a cigarette fiend,
She drinks more booze than I.
But the girl of my dreams ain’t as dumb as she seems …
She’s the sweetheart of six other guys.”
“Man on top of woman hasn’t long to stay.
His head is full of business and his ass is full of play.
He goes in like a lion and comes out like a lamb.
He buttons up his pants and doesn’t give a damn.”
“A mighty pain to love it is,
And ’tis a pain that pain to miss;
But, of all pains, the greatest pain,
Is to love, but love in vain.”
” Here’s to the maiden of bashful fifteen;
Here’s to the widow of fifty;
Here’s to the flaunting, extravagant queen,
And here ’s to the housewife that’s thrifty!
Let the toast pass;
Drink to the lass;
I’ll warrant she’ll prove an excuse for the glass.”
” But if at church they give some ale
And a pleasant fire for our souls to regale
We’d sing and we’d pray all the live long day
Nor ever once from the church to stray.”
Beer in Westwood...
Going Away Party...
Coachella Drunk Guy Tries Putting on Sandals...
Red Bull- Difference Between Love & Obsession...
All You Need...
Special Thanks to VD...
Need, Want, and Love...
Fat Lazy Woman...
Working in Chunks...
Stop Multitasking...
Human Connection in Business...
Lindsay Lohan Should Not Be Sent to Jail...
Like my cheesy pic? :)
August 28th, 2008 at 6:30 am
I have been looking for a toast for a long time and cannot locate it.
August 28th, 2008 at 6:32 am
I have been looking for a toast for a long time and cannot locate it. It Starts “Here’s to the wound that never heals …”, do you have any suggestions as to finding this hillarious toast?
August 28th, 2008 at 8:58 am
Here’s to the wound that never heals.
The more you scratch, the better it feels.
Here’s to you. Here’s to me.
Fuck you, here’s to me.
September 13th, 2008 at 11:18 am
Heres to the wound that never heals.
The more you rub it the better it feels.
Up to it, down to it, damn the man that wouldnt do it.
should be held down and made do it till he cant do it no more
September 27th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Here’s to honor…
To get honor
To stay honor
And if you can’t cum in her
Cum on her!
October 11th, 2008 at 9:37 pm
Here’s to the hole that never heals
The more you rub it the better it feels
And all the soap this side of hell
Won’t wash away that fishy smell
Wine, women, song, vice
Syphilis, blue balls, crabs and lice
We’ve had ‘em all by jesus christ
Gentlemen, the Queen.
October 11th, 2008 at 9:38 pm
I’ve also been looking for one that goes something along these lines…
“here’s to beers, and virgins’ tears”
but can’t remember the rest? Anyone know it?
November 23rd, 2008 at 3:11 pm
Here’s to the cut that never heals…..
not the hole!
November 24th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Here’s to the fire that doesn’t burn down chanties, but to the fire that burns in all the girls panties!
December 8th, 2008 at 9:11 pm
Here’s to the heat, not to the kind that ignites and burns down chanties, but to the kind that excites and pulls down panties!
January 9th, 2009 at 3:19 pm
Here’s the one we say at all Irish gatherings:
In heaven there is no beer,
that’s why we drink it here.
And when we’re gone from here,
our friends will be drinking all the beer!
January 13th, 2009 at 7:04 pm
Here’s to the girl with the little red shoes,
She drinks my whiskey, she drinks my booze,
She lost her cherry, but that’s no sin,
She still got the box that the cherry came in!
Here’s to the box!
January 15th, 2009 at 9:15 pm
Cereal in a bowl,
Coffee in a cup,
Poke her in tha butt so you don’t knock her up
February 1st, 2009 at 5:34 pm
Here’s to swimmin’ with bow legged women… and the wake that they make!
February 5th, 2009 at 1:52 am
An Ode to Beer
If I had a dog
that could piss this stuff,
and i was sure
he could piss enough,
I’d tie his head
to the foot of my bed,
and suck his dick
till we both dropped dead.
yeah, beer.
February 6th, 2009 at 6:00 am
A drink for a good live
A drink for a good live
A drink that never blows
A drink that alway shows
A drink for a friend
A drink that will never end
For when its all said and done
Lest all drink and have fun!!!!
February 13th, 2009 at 4:23 am
To The Boys Of Whitesville, We Live in Caves Spend Times In Ditches, Beat Our Cocks Agianst Jagged Rocks But Were Still Rugged Sons Of Bitches
February 13th, 2009 at 4:24 am
Ashes To Ashes Dust To Dust If It WErnt For Pussy My Pee Pee Would Rust
March 4th, 2009 at 1:35 pm
if my dog could piss this stuff
and he could piss enough
i’d tie his head
to the foot of my bed
and suck his dick ’til we both fell dead
March 17th, 2009 at 2:49 pm
correct toasts of some mistakes made above :
Sugar in the bowl, coffee in the cup, you poke her in the boat you won’t knock her up.
Heres to the girl i got it from heres to me for being so dumb, i hope shes around when i get well.. cause ill catch it again sure as hell
Heres to you heres to me the best of friends we’ll always be, if we shall ever disagree. FUCK you heres to me
Here’s to the breeze that blows through the trees it blows the skirts of the young girls knees, it leads to the sights that often please, but most often leads to STDS!.
feel free to email me about any toasts that you just can’t quite remember
March 28th, 2009 at 10:07 pm
Here’s to the peclican, who’s beak can hold more than his belly can, he can live for a week off the food in his beak and no on knows how the hell he can.
April 2nd, 2009 at 5:31 pm
here’s to the gash that heals… the harder you pound it the better it feels
here’s to girlfriends and lovers. i pray they never meet.
here’s to virgins… thanks for nothin
i offered my honor. she honored my offer.. all night it was honor and offer…
here’s to you. heres to me … best friends we’ll always be… but if we ever dissagree then fuck you and here’s to me
April 15th, 2009 at 8:19 pm
Honor ur offer,offer ur honor
Dont get off, til u get off on her
April 21st, 2009 at 9:56 pm
Here’s to you,
Here’s to me.
If we should ever disagree, Fuck you
Here’s to me
April 22nd, 2009 at 11:08 am
hi!!! ur drunk cheers n toasts r hilarious!!! but i do have one question….the picture on this page, the second one down w the man laying on the floor drunk and passed out…may i ask where that was originated from? the reason i ask this is because it is not the first time i have seen this pic and i am 99.99% positive that that is my father…..im not mad its on your site….so dont think that, i am just very concerned, he has been on a downward spiral for the past 5 years and it hurts to c him like that….please get back to me. thanku
krystal
April 26th, 2009 at 1:05 pm
Here’s to you
Here’s to me
Best of friends we’ll always be
But if we ever should disagree
Fuck you, here’s to me.
April 26th, 2009 at 11:24 pm
here’s to the stork that brings cute babies, here’s to the stork that brings ugly babies, and heres to the swallow that brings no babies.
May 5th, 2009 at 11:53 am
Heres to you, and heres to me, heres to drinking like a fish.
touch me here and touch me there, but don’t touch my whiskey bitch.
May 28th, 2009 at 9:38 pm
“Here’s to gunpowder and pussy,
live by one, die by the other,
love the smell of both.”
May 31st, 2009 at 7:06 pm
If your gonna say it say it right!!!!!
Here’s to fire… not the kind that burns down the shacks and the chanties, but the one that brings down the pants and the panties!!!!
May 31st, 2009 at 7:13 pm
She honored her offer, and offered her honor… All night long I was honor and offer!!
May 31st, 2009 at 7:17 pm
Told to the ladies, see if they get this one!!!
Six times six is thirty-six plus three is thirty-nine… I can measure the depths of yours before you can measure the length of mine.
June 1st, 2009 at 1:27 am
Here’s to the hole that never heals
the more you rub the better it feels
and all the soap this side of Hell
won’t wash away that fishy smell
June 6th, 2009 at 11:54 am
Here’s to the girl in the little red shoes. She’ll drink your liquor and she’ll drink your booze. She lost her cherry it’s a terrible sin, but she’s still got the box that the cherry came in!
July 3rd, 2009 at 12:31 pm
“To get on her. To stay on her. And if you can’t cum in her, cum on her”
July 3rd, 2009 at 1:55 pm
If the ocean was full of beer, and I was a duck
I’d swim to the bottom and drink it all up
But the ocean is not full of beer,
and I am not a duck
So I came here… to get FUCKED UP!!!
July 13th, 2009 at 8:51 pm
To Panties…
Not the greatest thing in the world, but the closest thing to it.
July 20th, 2009 at 11:49 am
Anybody know if I wanted to bookmark a post do I have to join Delicious first?
July 26th, 2009 at 8:26 am
“If I had a dog and it could piss this stuff, and i thought it could piss enough, I’d tie him up and put his dick in my mouth, I’d suck his dick till we both passed out.”
July 26th, 2009 at 8:27 am
“If vodka were water and I were a duck, I’d swim to the bottom and drink it all up, but vodka’s not water and I ain’t a duck, so slide me a bottle and shut the fuck up.”
July 26th, 2009 at 8:40 am
I met a man here tonight
He bought me lots of beer
He said my breasts were quite a site
So I told him to hold me near.
When that man drew me in
I kicked him in the nuts
so here’s to that man named ben
Who puked up all his guts.
July 29th, 2009 at 5:30 am
Here’s to you here’s to me, best friends we shall ever be, if we ever disagree, then fuck you here’s to me
August 8th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
this is the worst list of toasts. i think you need help. these are very depressing. best of luck with treatment for your psychological disorder!
August 11th, 2009 at 2:53 pm
Here’s to lesbians and virgins…. thanks for nothin!
August 19th, 2009 at 10:48 am
A toast to your enemies enemies.. (Irish toast)
August 22nd, 2009 at 12:03 am
To the four hinges of friendship
Lieing, cheating, stealing and drinking
If you must lie, lie for a beautiful woman
If you must cheat, cheat death
If you must steal, steal away from bad company
If you must drink, drink with me.
Here’s to women, beer and song, may none of them be flat.
There’s the wonderful love of a beautiful maid,
and the love of a strong true man.
There’s the love of a baby unafraid,
all existing since time began.
But the most wonderful love, the Love of Loves,
greater than the love for Mother,
is the intimate, tenderest, passionate love…
of one dead drunk for another!
September 5th, 2009 at 9:43 pm
the fleecy clouds may kiss the skys, the flowers kiss the butterflys, the foaming beer def kiss the glass, and you my friend can kiss my ass
(i learned that from my dad when i was 9 years old)
September 12th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
I met a boy here tonight,
he bought me lots of beer.
He said my tits were quite a site,
so he drew me near.
When that fucker drew me in,
I kicked him in the nuts.
So heres to the boy, in the john,
puking up his guts.
September 18th, 2009 at 3:00 pm
When God made little boys he made them out of string,
He had a little left over so he made a little thing.
when God made little girls he made them out of lace,
He had a little left over so he made a little space.
Here’s to space.
September 29th, 2009 at 11:27 am
Well here’s to the women we’ve met and the women we’ve fucked, and the many who haven’t had such luck. Well here’s to you and here’s to me and if ever by chance we should disagree well then fuck you and here’s to me.
October 8th, 2009 at 3:12 pm
here’s to the bee who got the bull buckin’
here’s to adam who stuck it to eve and got the whole world fuckin
here’s to you and here’s to me
best of friends we’ll always be
and if you ever disagree… FUCK YOU here’s to me!
October 8th, 2009 at 7:56 pm
here’s to you! here’s to me!
Better friends there will never be,
but if we chose to disagree, well fuck you and here’s to me!
November 1st, 2009 at 3:04 pm
Here´s to the wound that never heals
The more you rub it, the better is feels
And all the soap on this side of hell
Could not was away that fishy smell
Here´s to the wound
It follows like this
Cheers to the queers….
the rest i do not know
Grtz Yak
November 14th, 2009 at 11:18 pm
“Here’s to the mouse on the bar room floor,
that lapped up the beer & hollered for for more,
and as he sat in the pale moonlight,
He screamed ‘Bring on the pussy, I’m ready for a fight!’”
November 19th, 2009 at 8:38 pm
Heres to the Breeze that blows threw the trees , that Teases and Pleases, that lift the skrits above the girls neezes, so heres to the Snatch and Down the Hatch !
November 21st, 2009 at 5:16 am
Heres to the girls we got it from.
And heres to us for being so dumb.
And I hope there around when we get well.
Cuz we’ll catch it again sure as hell.
And the dog pissing sounds better when you refer to it as a female joke… let me explain.
If I had a girl that could piss this stuff.
And I was sure she could piss enough.
then I’d tie her head to the foot of my bed.
And suck her clit till we both dropped dead
December 4th, 2009 at 7:34 pm
another ending to the “Honor toast”
Here’s to Honor
Here’s to Getting on her
and staying on her
and if you can’t cum in her
Cum on her
She Offered her honor
I honored her offer
and all night long, I was off her and on her
And if for some reason, I should fall off her
here’s to one more time of getting back on her.
December 7th, 2009 at 8:27 am
Another version of one:
Here’s to you
And here’s to me
May we never disagree
But if we do
To hell with you
And here’s to me.
December 11th, 2009 at 4:41 pm
Just another toast you could put on here. Its always a hit with the guys but the chicks arent the biggest fans.
“to the east to the west. she must admit i was the best. To the north to the south. I fucked her tits and i fucked her mouth. I fucked her standing and i fucked her lying. If she had wings i’de fuck her flying, but now shes dead and long forgotten so i’ll dig her up and fuck her rotten.”
December 20th, 2009 at 6:28 pm
Cheers to best friends we’ll be, if we ever part, fuck you and here’s to me!
January 8th, 2010 at 7:56 pm
sugar in a bowl, coffee in a cup, fuck her in the butt, you won’t knock her up
February 10th, 2010 at 2:24 pm
What is the one that starts:
“Here’s to women, cards and dice,
Lift up her skirt and take a slice….”
February 25th, 2010 at 7:08 pm
Heres to the maid of honor, and all the nites i laid upon her, i fucked her sitting, i fucked her lying, if she had wings id fuck her flying, but now shes dead but not forgotten so lets dig that bitch up and i ll fuck her rotten.
February 26th, 2010 at 7:10 pm
Here’s to the breezes that blow through the tree’zes. They blow girls skirts high above their knee’zes. They teases, they pleases and somtimes they spread diseases. Fuck it here’s to the breezes.
March 8th, 2010 at 10:23 pm
Here’s to the colored girl down on the farm
pussy hairs as long as your arm
nipples as big as your thumb
but the wiggle of her ass could make a dead man cum
March 26th, 2010 at 8:48 am
Here’s to guns that shoot straight.
Here’s to parachutes that inflate.
Here’s to girls that suck dick on a first date!
March 30th, 2010 at 9:11 am
Here’s to fancy cars and great big trucks
And Indiana women who love to fuck!
April 14th, 2010 at 9:03 pm
For the Montana boys….
Here’s to us Montana boys
We sleep in dirt and ditches
Where pussy’s rare
We fuck it bare
We’re mean sons of bitches
April 17th, 2010 at 10:04 am
we were brought into this world sucking on a boob,
heres to hoping thats how we’ll die too
April 21st, 2010 at 5:55 pm
“THE CHEERS GAME”
Here’s to phillipino women that do it so well,
if they won’t fuck us then what the hell,
Here’s to Rape, Riot, and Revolution,
may virginity parish and prostitution flourish,
may SON-A-BITCH become a common household word,
Here’s to the bee that stung the bull,
and started the bull-a-buckin,
Here’s to Atom that ate the apple,
and started the world-a-fuckin,
If you ever get to it and don’t do it,
may you never live through it to get to it to do it again,
HELL,
bee’s do it and die, bird’s do it and fly,
dog’s do it and stick to it so fuck it why can’t I
“CHEERS”
April 22nd, 2010 at 7:38 am
Here’s to bigger beers,
We ain’t no queers,
if it wudn’t for me,
there’d be no beers
May 16th, 2010 at 11:58 pm
here is to the girls in the high hill shoes we love our men like we love our booze we lost our cheeries nbut that is no sin we still have the ‘box’ that our cherries came in
May 17th, 2010 at 12:01 am
this is to having single doing doubles and multiples seeing tripple and expierences multiples to testing negative. in honor if you cant come in her come on her and atay on her
May 17th, 2010 at 12:02 am
i am never above you never below you but alwats beside tou
May 17th, 2010 at 12:04 am
this is to the heat not to the heat that bring down shacks and shantys but to the heat that brings down bras n panties
May 17th, 2010 at 12:05 am
heres to it if i am asleep wake me if im awake make me may we always do it heres to it
May 28th, 2010 at 12:27 pm
there are woodships, steel ships, and battleships that all sail the sea, but the only ship that matters is the friendship between you and me!
June 3rd, 2010 at 2:05 pm
Here’s to the men we love the best,
We love them best when they’re undressed,
We’ll fuck’em sitting, standing and lying,
And if they had wings, we’d fuck’em flyin,
When they’re dead and long forgotten,
We’ll dig’em up and fuck’em rotten.
June 10th, 2010 at 12:33 am
here is to you and to me, the good friends we’ll be,
here is to the people we have fucked, and those with no suck luck,
here is to beer in the glass and vodka in the cup, and doing girls in the ass so they don’t get knocked up,
here is to you and to me and especially the ones who lick us were we pee…..
June 12th, 2010 at 9:28 am
Here’s to lying, cheating, stealing, and drinking…
If you’re going to lie, lie for a friend.
If you’re going to cheat, cheat death.
If you’re going to steal, steal a heart.
If you’re going to drink, drink with me.
June 17th, 2010 at 8:48 pm
you have it wrong this is the right way
HERES TO THE GIRL IN THE LITTLE RED SHOES
SHE LL SPEND ALL YOUR MONEY
SHE LL DRINK ALL YOUR BOOZE
SHE MAY NOT HAVE HER CHERRY
BUT THATS NOT A SIN
CAUSE I STILL GOT THE BOX THAT MY CHERRY CAME IN
June 17th, 2010 at 8:49 pm
another correction
HERES TO YOU AND HERES TO ME
SHALL WE NEVER DISAGREE
BUT IF WE DO
FUCK YOU HERES TO ME
June 19th, 2010 at 1:01 pm
Here’s to cobras and rubbers- two things I don’t fuck with
July 14th, 2010 at 10:54 am
To our children: May their fathers be rich and moms be hot!
July 20th, 2010 at 4:34 pm
Here’s to the women we’ve met, and the women we’ve fucked,
And to those among us who’ve had no such luck.
Here’s to beer in the glass and vodka in the cup,
Here’s to poking her in the ass so she wont get knocked up.
Here’s to you and here’s to me, together as friends we’ll always be,
But if we should ever disagree, then fuck all of you, here’s to me!
July 27th, 2010 at 4:35 pm
Here’s to you and here’s to me, in hope we never disagree
If by by chance we ever do, then here’s to me and the hell with you.
one of my favorite my dad always said
July 30th, 2010 at 8:49 pm
HERES TO HELL HOPEFULLY THE STAY THERE IS AS GOOD AS THE WAY THERE
August 8th, 2010 at 9:06 pm
Here’s to the girl that I love best
I love her best when she’s at rest
but when she’s dead and long forgotten
I’ll dig her up and fuck her rotten!
August 14th, 2010 at 6:04 pm
This one’s to the breezes,
That flows through the trees-es,
That lifts girls skirts above their knees-es,
to reveal that special place that teases, pleases, and spreads diseases.
O’ God! What a snatch! Down the old Hatch.
- you’re supposed to say it like that because you wouldn’t pronounce words like trees-es or knees-es as plurals unless you were drunk. Like Captain Jack Sparrow
August 16th, 2010 at 11:40 am
“Here’s to the women we’ve met, and to the women we’ve fucked,
And to those amongst us who’ve had no such luck.
Here’s to beer in the glass, and vodka in the cup,
Here’s to pokin’ her in the ass, so she won’t get knocked up.
Here’s to all of you, and here’s to me,
together as friends we’ll always be,
but if we should ever disagree,
then FUCK ALL OF YOU, HERE’S TO ME!”*
August 17th, 2010 at 3:08 pm
Here’s to you,
Here’s to me,
The best of friends we’ll always be,
If by chance we disagree,
Fuck you!
Here’s to me