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Ideas for Hollywood Sequels

Wednesday, September 12th, 2007
Posted in Entertainment by Joel Gross

Hollywood has run out of ideas for good new movies, so now it primarily does remakes and sequels… Here are some I would like to see:

-301: The Vengeance- Instead of having 300 Greeks kick the living crap out of millions of Persians, we give 300 Persians the opportunity to attempt an assault on one large grapefruit. Of course, all of the Persians will die in the end.

-Romeo and Juliet 2: The Office- two star-cross’d lovers die untimely deaths after their wicked boss, played by the legendary Keanu Reeves, hatches a cunning plot to bore them to death with endless mundane details. Subplot to include wretched Medusa and her constant stupidity.
-Hairy Peter and the Magical Fish Taco- Not much plot, just lots of action… much like the series.

-The Soulless- Horror movie in which a nice young financial lawyer slowly morphs into an evil corporate monster who works 16 hours a day 7 days a week and feeds children to lions.

-The Simpsons Movie 2: Real life- The Simpson’s family is played by real people. Homer will be played by Jack Nicholson who will attempt to “visualize” him as a tortured soul.